LEAVING A NARCISSIST 😮 BREAKING UP WITH CODEPENDENT NARCISSIST RELATIONSHIP

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  1. Lisa, I am totally absorbing every word…You are a great teacher, Im so glad I found your teachings…Thank you from the bottom of my heart! I hope youre having a great day! Thank you, Shari

  2. Thank you for this information.  It really helps in my recovery from being in this type of relationship.  It really puts things in perspective.

  3. you said it will hurt .. and the first step is to accept that it will hurt .. and I'm totally with you..
    then you say it might take 3-6 months .. but can it last for longer? I think it might take longer for me .. is that normal?

  4. Some people think these phony narcissist are such great people when they don't even know them or where they even live . It's ridiculous! They don't think someone would tell lies about their life to get pity and to destroy all relationships with their victims. They want to be center of attention and take all love and attention away from their victims.

  5. You nailed all my thoughts to the board. For the last year and half, I have been educating myself on this topic because I am at present, going through a breakup with a Narcissist. Everything you expressed, I experienced. Learning about how the different parts of the brain operates was the highlight for me. We have been together for 8 years. The last 3 years have been pure hell. A girlfriend of mine who does counseling, exposed me to the word Narcissist. I never gave this any thought, until I began to educate myself and in doing so, lay on the floor sobbing myself away. Allowing this pain and emotions to move from my body and mind sure is an effective release. Before, I would cover them up and pretended they don't exist. To you, Melanie Tonia Evans, Sam Vankim (not sure If I got his last name correct), keep up the magnificient and educational work. Your journeys were mean't for a greater purpose to mankind. Love and peace to you!

  6. I think you have been stalking me and telling my story! 😉 I married a Narcissistic addict, produced one, who is also a co-dependent when her Father at age 8 went full blown Narcissistic addict. My daughter married a Narcissist Alcoholic so reminiscent of her Father. She is being abused by him almost to the point of death and killing herself with Meth and Heroin. My father is/was an emotionally vapid, Narcissist and my mother was so co-dependent that she never saw me. They were abusive to each other and all of us 10 children. I remember crying and begging my mother at age 22 to love me and her emotionless, non-plussed reaction. Everyone around me is broken in some way. I am on the precipice of abject failure and despair. Until last night after yet again another 're-con rush and save' the drug addict daughter, police interaction, and having to deliver my daughter into the hands of her husband who showed up, both of them have suspended licenses and I was assigned by the police to drive them to his parents house where he lives with his Narcissistic and codependent parents. I was also told by the police to get along with my son-in-law for my daughters sake. My daughter lived there for 6 years until she bolted and prefers to live on the streets in her car. She is stuck in leaving him and going back to him endlessly. When I returned home at 1:30 am, I jumped on You tube to find out about how to leave your addict and codependency and stumbled upon you. I never understood why I always felt small, invisible and unworthy. Exact words I have said out loud for years. I never understood why everyone around me was sucking my soul dry, why I was afraid, alone and left feeling betrayed by the very people that were supposed to love me. I loved them. Why I gave up my own life for them. Didn't that prove it? Why didn't want to be alive and feel this pain anymore and then I had my epiphanous moment last night. This is the beginning of the road. I always felt I wasn't good enough and failed all of them around me. I failed my siblings as I watched them beaten and abused and screaming inside as a young girl, stepping in front of them as a teenager until my mother threw my clothes out onto the front lawn and forbade me to see my minor siblings. . I failed my husband and he died in 2003, acute OD of heroin, vicodin and cocaine. I failed my mother and she died in 2006, rare disease, Cortical Basal Degeneration. I failed my brother and he died in 2013, Alcoholism. I live with my disabled brother who is an alcoholic and has suicidal ideation. And I am failing my daughter and I am in constant fear of the phone call that she is gone. I have thought I was insane. I have wondered what is wrong with me. I'm defective. I did something wrong. I caused their diseases. I have cried out into the heavens at night silently begging, help me. help me. help me.

  7. I watched this whole video and can relate to every word. The one thing is like to point out at the moment is them being "one up". I'm always accused of " setting him up"! Like I planned he was going to say and do things to hurt me. I'm usually sitting flabbergasted while he tells me that he is ten steps ahead of me!! So I'm thinking… Why does he feel the need to be ten steps ahead of me? I thought things were good! Realistically not so. He is the one with ulterior motives and he's obviously just projecting them onto me. Does this make sense?

  8. This hits home to what I'm painfully going through right now…….I've been studying all your videos for a month straight. You are a HUGE blessing, Lisa! Thank you so much for your soul, for being on this journey with me, all of us and helping everyone heal, xo

  9. Mine has smashed my stuff .. my nice things .. so I guess I get a whole new clean slate and environment .. maybe its a good thing …to have new untainted things that have new energy … makes sense .. scary beginnings .. not knowing yet how to get the hell out of this mess .. ugh ..

  10. Do narcissist ever recover from their psychological  affliction ?? This stuff looks epidemic from all the videos I see and the comments … holy wow … and they are so sneaky .. nice on the outside cold hearted on the inside … holding prayer and good thoughts for all of us going through this ..

  11. I am NO GOOD. Ezactly- wasted my life playing this mind game. My Mom could not bond with me and blamed me for it. BUT I think the problem was that I sub consciously knew she was feeding me poison (Cow's Milk)– Serious, strangely, I have a picture where she made me a cake with HFCS frosting and she was laughing at how it effected me. She knew it was making me sick and fed me it and laughed at me. Serious.

  12. i just broke up whit my boyfriend 2 weeks ago ,afhter 5 years living whit a narcisist ,it took me years to get to make this disision,dep in my heart i know this was nnot good for me but like your story i had a horible childhoud wht mental abuse and fisicul abuse and my mom was also diferent when my dad was no around i had "2 moms" and that confuse a child one day she coud say to me "goodmorning!" and the nex day "leave me alone" no in this relation ship whit my boyfriend i feld the same till i start to read and look one you tube and everiting fits, and waht drive me grazy is that he could never listen he went one and one even if i daid "but we can also talk in peace and understanding,,even relation ship therapie did not help yes he played along for a month and then back to his old self, now that its over im the most horible woman one earth! and he shout at me one the phone, i try to explaine in a few mails how it made me feel al these years but i onley pick ONE! word out of the mail and turn it against me,, how many times he made me cry!!! now i try to get loose from him but my stomach turns and i still want anwers and to be heard, this comes also from my childhoud never be heard

  13. Lisa, I love your videos. Your cover photo grabbed me.

    Your sweet voice is kind. Thank you.

    A guru in India said that people tell him: "I got married because my parents pushed me into it… (Later he hears) 'I'm in this marriage because of the kids.' ….. (Then older ones tell him) 'I'm only here married because of the grandchildren."

    He says that they are a victim their whole lives.

  14. how you described you wanted love from your mom like a fat kid wants cake, thats how my childhood was with my mom. And the deprevation of emotional support or conversation with her led me into drugs.. so I think the issues go hand in hand…in this video you said that those issues are different and valid for the parent to get mad at the kid, but the reason the kids are doing drugs is because they know the parents didnt love them. heroin kept me alive or i probably would have killed myself. parents can be mad about kids drug use but we are a reflection of them when we live under there roof. my mom chose to use my drug addiction to judge me and that just made me more depressed and do more drugs because she used it as an excuse to not give me love and affection, when she gave my 2 young brothers hugs and kisses in front of me.

  15. Thank you for this. I tried to leave last summer. I was gone for 4 months. Then I went back and now I am thinking about leaving for good because I just can't be unauthentic to myself anymore. I hate this! 😢

  16. How after being an ACOA for many years and raised by violent and alcoholic parents does one identify if im co- dependant/Narcissist/A victim. Im unsure what it is i am after watching your videos. I feel like im all 3 of the above. Keep up the great informative videos. ☺

  17. I loved what you said about changing the art in your house!! Also eating the ice cream but I don't need any encouragement in that department … I had a wall of art in a room of my house which while each one of them was really beautiful they were also pretty much the gates of hell, actually there were two photos of Rodin's Gates of Hell that I had done some editing to and really liked them, whew!, in any event I took a look at that wall and said, "this has to change." Hmmmm.. I simply replaced the center photograph with an old nostalgic looking print of a little girl sitting on a swing looking over at stone wall into a field and in front of her there is a baby Robin on a branch – and she simply gazes at the Robin in wide eyed, innocent wonder. Yeah. That's just perfect. I still have my gates of hell and my Execution of Lady Jane Grey and photos of my own sculptures but… Inside of all of those which truly exist, let's bring back the small child, yet unscathed by the world.

  18. Thank You Lisa. You are doing great work. Very inspiring to me and in helping me on my healing journey. I live alone now after 17 years with a passive/aggressive narcissist. Am also going through the "wake-up" phase with my other relationships that do not serve me. It's painful, but I, like you, am getting myself in alignment with my True Self, and will only allow healthy relationships in. Again, I'm listening and learning so much from you. God Bless! 🙂

  19. My Narcissist ignored me for two weeks then came back as if nothing happened. I told him let me tell you something about me, there is no man alive whom I cannot live without , you are free to stay and also free to leave my life. I share my love with persons who appreciate it , I will not share my love with you because I am satisfied you are not worth it. He had not come back since. Be very clear.

  20. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I had a narcissistic mother and have suffered with narcissistic relationships all my life; including ones with friends. I am now 58 and have just come across the narcissistic syndrome, so am starting a path of recovery due to awareness. Thank you, again, for your valuable help. With much love xxx

  21. oh.. my wife is a "narcissist".. where should i go for help? My wife and i from the very start (5 years ago) have been having issues. I'm not perfect. I certainly was lonely when i was 23-24 working a lot, i really was not thinking i was ready for a marriage or that i was headed towards one, i was certainly acting irresponsible. Anyways the first problems I encountered was when i would say or ask something and out of nowhere she would suddenly look away or be looking away and not answer like she didn't hear me.. so i would think and verify what i said and reissue it.. still nothing.. at first it was like.. huh.. so i would drop it. as those scenarios would progress there was a time when i would become confrontational about it, it eventually stopped. to this day i still don't know what it was all about but it was odd and lasted a few years. next and similar was the extra hours spent in bed, she still does it. Easily will spend 10-14 hours in bed. not all of it sleeping. usually while shes there shes got her attitude on. I've tried coax her out, bringing up, "your still in bed dear.." and then at times i would say "your still there?!?" so after going through the spectrum it appears none of it works.. As you mentioned does not make any kind of bonding with our daughter. she'll humor her from time to time, but its like you say. doesn't really see her. I don't know why i already knew and felt i needed to look her in the eyes when i spoke to her, but i do and i agree with it.. also were having problems because she does the minimalist when it comes to chores or tasks. shell do dishes sometimes and clean around the house like once the month the spectrum of our family objectives are vastly more complicated then a few menial tasks. Shes emotional and i cant criticize her properly still. its really bad.. 5 years ago the first pans we got were a set of Teflon. I told her were not supposed to use a metal utensil on them because of A,B and C… when i was told that i was like oh yeah that makes sense.. end of story.. I've had to bring it up many times to no avail. i saw it again yesterday. All advice or criticism I've ever given has resulted in the evil glare. I initially blamed myself for not saying it correctly.. well i assure you she hates anything anyone else has to say… I observed when others have given her advice or tried to correct an action.. though she wore a "mask" it was evident.

    Anyways this could turn into a long list of short falls among a complicated life. These problems I'm thinking come from some root causes. I don't completely understand it but its taking everything out of my i feel blackmailed. I just cant do it all on my own and i cant get her to do.. she always manipulates to do her minimalism. For my daughters sake please tell me your ideas on way forward even if they are just guess's. thank you.

  22. At 6 and a half minutes you are talking about mom's with disdain for their children… BAM!!!… I watch my wife treat our two boys with utter disdain and only serve them notice or attention for the most basic of things… food, nappies, etc. and handle them like footballs. Her mother is just the same… like an army sergeant issuing commands without so much as a "Hi" or a smile or an acknowledgment which allows them the time to break away from what they are doing or thinking and turn their attention to her.

    Loud voice always. When she enters the room she is the center of the show… the main attraction. My youngest, from the time he could crawl and walk still follows her around the house crying for her to pick him up and cuddle him but to no avail. She gives heavy sighs and rants about him doing this and openly shows her dislike for being followed by a toddler. I could go on and on…

    I am in a hotel room typing this now. I left three days ago. I have had enough. The Hoovering is just beginning. I miss my boys. It is so damn tough… keep watching these videos… observe, don't absorb… one step at a time…

  23. Love your videos. I finally found out that I am a co dependent a week ago. I moved out from my narc of a mothers' house 4 years ago. It was so extremely painful, but it was so worth it. I moved in with my best friend, I mean my covert narc best friend,who is exactly like my mother to a tee. I've always hated getting close to people,because I felt that people will always use you or hurt you. I'm starting to see now that the problem is me. I care waaay too much about other's thoughts,opinions,and views of me. Now, I'm done running from my demons. I'm done being on this emotional rollercoaster. I love your no bull shit approach to this. Your videos are giving me so much hope. Bless

  24. excellent advice. I here now "Ive had enough. Everything you said is spot on. I told him to leave today and guess what he is sitting on the couch. WTF its so hard to get rid of him after 20 years of abuse. Ive lost 173 pounds like you said he has to be above. So he has started talking with women going for dinners saying "they are just friends" I have started to binge eat. I lost a whole person now I have started to eat and eat. Thank you for this. Dealing with this rather than suffocating myself with food. He needs to go.

  25. Lisa A. Romano you are a light being and an amazing soul! Thank you so much for these priceless videos! You are helping thousands of people! I am SO very grateful to you! Love and Light! Namaste!

  26. I am in the middle of trying to get out of a narcissistic relationship with someone I live with. However, he has a 9 yr old daughter That I have a strong relationship with and her mother is not involved. I feel guilty leaving her as she is not mine and I can't take her with me. I falling apart inside and I don't want her to think I just walked out on her. I don't think he will let me see her if I leave either so I'm torn.

  27. Your video made me cry, I never realized I was attracting the wrong people all the damn time. So many mistakes, so many problems. God bless you, your words of wisdom are healing me.

  28. I need to watch this every day. I have been married for 15 years with 2 kids and have recently found out I am married to a narc. I want out. Why is my husband all of a sudden mentioning divorce? At least every other day he mutters about getting a divorce. My heart flutters at the thought that he wants out too. But I feel as if it is a trick, or some mind game. I don't know what my next step is.

  29. i am having a problem my lover seems to be a psycho. .he made me to be
    single aparting from my frnds.he wants me to be single.now i wants to
    leave him but he dnt wants to leave me and making me to be in trouble.plzzz anyone give me suggestion am really suffering frm him.

  30. i absolutely can see sam steos in my life, I got a lot of the ath when returned to foo to face and see the past and reconnect with my child, on another level i know i returned to leave and detach forever and do it for that child i was as well. There is a huge iece i found from you in this very talk about loving own self as i do it as it actually trully sucks, i left many n before with one major one – "a devil" my awakener but now it has been a LOOONG proces of removing bonds with my own foo. I consider looing up sessions with you,as i resonate and understand all you speak from my own expwriencess .

  31. Thank you once again! Thank you for leading me back to myself,To where ( I can now be present for the Healing) I'm not afraid to be present in my own life anymore.And you know what it's like to be that Lost.Believe me?As I write this,I am having the Best cry of my Life! Big Warm Astral Hug! I wish I knew how to explain how much you've helped me!

  32. This is weird, towards me leaving my ex npd husband, I suddenly started noticing this blackness/almost evil vibe in the house when he was present. It was so bizarre – It was literally like evil just walked in; maybe evil is the wrong word, or maybe it's the right word…

    This vid too made me recall a 'marriage counselling' session, I'd been self harming & this particular time had to go to the hospital – the nurse that later saw my bandages asked what happened, I said, I did it. I had no answer/lie ready, I was exhausted so bad & just wanted out one way or another, anyway she looked at me & said what do you mean, was it an accident – I said no, I self harm. I don't know where the voice was coming from, he was sat right there too. Anyway she brought another nurse in & she told me she has experience in this blah blah & ended up somehow being our 'marriage counsellor – Anyway she rocks up at our house for this appointment- he'd known all week what day and what time & he still strolls home half hour late & we're waiting for him. Then the punk has the audacity to say, I'm going for a haircut, I said what, are you not staying, the counsellor is here (she's in the same room as this convo) I said it's important you're here, it's marriage counselling! He started ranting I gotta get my haircut, I said you can go after it's a walk-in barbers. He's laughing at me being all jovial & like I'm making a big deal out of nothing & off he goes leaving me with the counsellor. And to cap it she said, Sonia from what I just witnessed I think you have control issues, that scenario that just played out was about you..
    I nearly lost my mind internally, I was brave enough to say, this was an appointment where we both need to be present, he goes on about this marriage being important & wanting to fix things, you come & his haircut is now more important. He could of gone anytime or after you left – how is that me controlling him.

    It was a long time later when I got in touch with a domestic violence team & I remember recanting this story to my dvla officer as she asked for many examples & scenarios – She told me then and there, you can never go into marriage counselling with an abusive partner as their reality & the truth will never match up & it usually makes things worse.. That resonated with me, I was like – Sonia you were crazy trying to have counselling with a sociopathic nutjob.. Who really is the crazy one…

    Your statement about grieving and giving yourself time to let the pain come out & learn to coexist with it instead of running is right on the money.. I really had to force myself to go through it.. It does make you stronger – Whether you want to be or not..
    Your comment about loving yourself etc, I think I'm still nurturing myself, that child that was put down/ignored & criticised & as a woman made to feel ugly & disgusting – I do what I want, I wear as much makeup as I want, I wear skinny jeans if I want, I wear high heels if I want – all the things I could never do or be or feel & I get so much pleasure from such stupid things, to me it's the difference between existing & living, I'm free. When I have low moments, struggling with work/bills/kids, anything, I remind myself, this or 'That' – what was with him & flipping try & shake myself out of it, I'm free & that contentment & freedom to just be your silly self with your daft habits & hobbies is amazing. There isn't no price on that.. Narc free is like winning the euro millions! If someone doesn't like you or makes you feel ill – remove them. It's amazing knowing I have that choice & can & will execute it.
    Love lots Lisa – Thankyou again
    These vids just validate I am on the right path, they say you shouldn't talk about narc abuse with someone that hasn't a clue, I agree with that, I did it & felt even worse, they don't get it – With your vids, they definitely give a boost. xoxoxo

  33. thanks, this is exactly what my mother is like, and she seems like a monster I have to survive. She turns every one around against me and tells every one that I am the problem and that I every thing I do is wrong! And she always turns all the attention round to her, so she is in the spotlight, and her needs are of course more important than her kids. I have felt very emotional abused!!

  34. 2006 I left my husband of 22 years we just grow apart bad separation he did not except me leaving , then in 2008 I meet my current partner and one year in I was on panic tablets sleeping tablets stress right out lost jobs because of him stressing me didn't know what was going as he would do the love bomb, so I seeker out natural healing therapy , and became a healer in energy healing and became a light walker , 8 years in this relationship he is a narcissist I am in counciling now to help me move out and stay away as I have left twice and came back , I thought I was going crazy and thought why do I stay here why can't I leave , I want my life back

  35. Yup.They do not care.Yup. They cannot.Omg!So true. My ex-husband is a total different level of a sociopath than my boyfriend now that is very intelligent & hurtful. Idk how to get him removed in a healthy way. I am trying hard to remove him from my life.

  36. My mom and grandma are narcissists. My dad probably is too but he was never home much so idk. I tried to kill myself when i was 8 for the first time. I was taught that my life only matters if i make my family happy. (I'm also transgender and i was forced to supress my true self so that i would get a bit of the love illusion from my family that i craved as a kid. When i was older, 19 or something, i couldnt take it anymore and went to a psyhologst to get hormones and stuff my mom told me that she'd rather that i killed myself than accept that she had a son and not a daughter. She also couldnt accept that i wanted to study philosophy and not medicine and she mentaly abused me for 3 years because i chose a philosophy study in college) now i'm 22. Gonna be 23 soon. And i finnaly understand that my parents never cared and i'll be moving away from them in the next 2 weeks. Just wanted to share this for anyone suicidal because of abuse: it does get better and although u still care for your parents you learn to accept that they dont and to just say "enough of this bullshit pain" and just go be happy with the people who actually care.

  37. I so appreciate this video because I realize that when I ended my relationship with a narcissist 4 years ago, I did nothing. My life came to a standstill. It took everything I have to survive the pain and the chaos and fallout, that it did not occur to me to take back control of my life. I have been stuck for 4 years. I have isolated. I stopped listening to music all together. I stopped with the candles. I stopped with any beauty in my life at all. I stopped with any affection from anyone except my children. No friendships. No anything. I shut my mind down. I shut my heart down. It was such a destructive relationship and it nearly destroyed me and my relationship with my children. Instead, I built huge walls around me and there they have been for the last four years. And I mean, I locked it all up tight. No open windows, no open doors. No feelings. No emotions. That explains a lot to me about why my life looks like it does.

  38. This video was worth taking time out of my busy day. It is as though you have watched a video of my entire life and now (in a very timely manner) I finally have a platform where I can get direction, began healing, and to gain the strength to move forward with my life. I am married to a narcissist and life has been hell from the beginning not to mention growing up with narcissistic parents with no connection. What a breath of fresh air. Thank you.

    Wonderful!!!

  39. Lisa, my husband is controlling and gets angry very quickly. He doesn't forgive or forget if I do even a smallest thing wrong. He gives me silent treatment for days. He doesn't feel bad when I cry. It's miserable way of living. Your videos are helping me and I finally believe that he will never change.

  40. It has been 3yrs. since I left my violent narcissist. I dont think I can ever trust another man. I have been single this whole time. I used to be out and make eye contact with people…but now I see I cant even do that anymore. I was totally heart broken.

  41. Oh Lisa going through the process! Living alone for the first time in my life! And speaking of art I LOVE the tree behind you! Where did you find it? My book of poetry which writing that was healing is called, The Seven Story Tree

  42. This: "Maybe no body will ever love me like he does." is what he would say to me.. "Nobody will ever love you like I do" Now I think thank God for that, he was incapable of love. His other favourite shit test type phrases were: I can do whatever I want and you will still love me. You should be lucky that someone loves you at your age.

  43. Oh! The therapist! Exactly. We were told to be a dry pump. They hated when I told the truth, however, when I finally did…the Truth set me free! And yes, divorcing the narcissist, sucks! But I'm doing it. Boom!

  44. I can't remember ever making eye contact with my parents. I hadn't even thought about that until watching this video. Thank you for all your helpful videos, I know I'm not alone.

  45. Narcs always say people that they have dated in there past were crazy. The people who have schizophrenia, bipolar etc….they do not have the Quality supply that they're looking for they are not suitable for Narcs. I am saying this from what l have experienced being around these demons.They want caring, empathetic,clear minded, hopeful, hard working, empath,codependent individuals. Narcs want Quality SUPPLY that they can drain your resources and energy day in day out than discard you.

  46. Hi Cassandra my name is self
    Hi self it is nice to finally meet you…
    Can we make a connection?
    Absolutely!
    Great!
    Where would you like to start?
    Let's take a walk and enjoy nature….
    Sounds like a wonderful place to start.:)

  47. The knowledge and the profound insights you share.. Is no less than life saving. My life so far has meant carrying an undeniable but undefinable pain. Feeling that acute pain and warning signals of something beeing so wrong, but not being able to pinpoint it. "It's just me".. "The bulimic, constantly anxious, over reacting, depressed, needy, negative, ADHD, neurotic".. Etc, etc…

    THANK YOU. That's not enough. Everything starts to make some sort of sense thnxh to this new knowledge. Now for the first time in my life I get a sense of compass; what direction to look to be able to begin the process of healing.
    Much love!

  48. This is a great video Lisa , thank you . You are helping me right now. You are an angle to me, cas I feel I would never hear these words I feel and know.💛

  49. "groomed to be a codependent"…
    oy-
    i see too much of this in me regarding being two different people in front of my son when my husband is around compared to when we are away from his father…

  50. This sounds just like me I'm 24 an have 3 kids with him. im a stay at home mom an have no friends cause he has drove them all away. Everyone loves him too an they say how lucky I am 🤔. He cheats all the time lies an he is abusive also I feel stuck.. what can I do to make myself ok to leave?

  51. Lisa, Thank you SO much for doing what you do here on youtube. I have watched 4 of your videos today – one right after the other – since breaking up w/ my partner of 3 yrs & finally realizing he has narcisstic tendancies. It has been SO helpful to hear your stories & your take on codependancy & narc relationships! I see now the "love-bombing of the 1st year, then the slow transition to dismissing, ignoring & devalueing, and also the many mind-games. The most important thing I see, now, is that I allowed this behavior because of my abusive childhood & lack of self. I have taken your advise & have taken many notes 😉👍 and have journaled, and although it is excruciating to be "alone again" & apart from him for a week now, because of You & your help, I am NOT going to reconcile w him & Im going to take your advise & just keep doing the next right thing for ME…minute by minute sometimes, and I know I will continue to grow stronger in my love&light and that, TRULY, I will be ok!!! Bless You💜👏👏👌and THANK YOU!!!

  52. How do you tell the Narc spouse you are ending it? I'm ready but I don't want him to fight. I want to do this as cordial as possible. However he has this competitive have to win mentality but also the face of the good guy to uphold.

  53. I just went no contact on this Friday and now in the next step my narc caused me to lose my job and I basically am left with nothing I don't have any MONEY should I just be patient and wait for GOD to help because I'm really truly devastated by what they did to me. life does suck right now very bad but I believe it get better it's just hard to face the reality but the truth of who they are will set us Free, the grieving process is almost unbearable I feel like I'm in "the hole" being punished by them why should I be left with nothing if they caused so much hurt to me???? while they are off telling more and more lies getting help and everything while I struggle to live life period I just don't get it she told me before I cut her off that she would lie on me if I cut her off, and I cut ger off so it's a chance/risk that I took I just couldn't take her abuse any longer so if she causes trouble it's basically nothing I can do she even told me verbally over the phone she wants me dead so I definitely don't TRUST her I have kids with her so my focus is to fully recover first and second get my kids back to Remove them from that evil toxic woman man it is so messed up when it doesn't have to be this way but they made this way and of course I get blamed for any and all things as usual PLEASE PRAY BLESSING'S FOR MY LIFE I NEED IT BAD

  54. Thank you!!! Even though I walked away from my narcissist 3 years I had to find inner healing on my own.  I have days I try and piece together what and when it went wrong…but I knew things were going sour.  I'm free and all the videos I have viewed about Narcs it has helped me use my discernment spirit.  I had to live as he moved on to his now new no having clue love bombed victim. I love myself and am happy!!

  55. Just ended a 3 year relationship with someone I had no idea was a narcissist. She completely turn my head into noodles and my nervous system got fried. I am just beginning the haling process. Thanks for your guidance.

  56. It's so painful. Mine has just cheated and here I am trying not to contact HIM. Needing to know he loves me. Of course he doesn't, he cheated, but I just don't love myself enough. It's a drug.

  57. This opend my eyes so much. I immediatly called for therapy after seeing this. so thank you so much. I have a long way to go. but gonna do it anyway. in a weird way I can thank the nex even. without him I wouldn't have known to look within. happy healing everyone

  58. Ty again Lisa, coming close to ending narc marriage #4..I needed to hear this again! Now that I completely understand what I've been doing for 30+years, I know I can do t right this time with your help. Ty for being my shining love light. Namaste' j

  59. I started watching your videos and many others about a year ago when I first discovered what was happening to me and I was deep in a relationship with a very very emotionally cruel but amazingly slick narcissist who I had fallen deeply in love with. I knew him back in high school and he reconnected with me when he saw my name changed back to my maiden name on Facebook and immediately contacted me. I now know GE was hunting and he took me down like a wounded animal🦌. I never saw it coming and it was a night when I felt like I was loosing my mind and contemplating suicide when for some reason I turned on YouTube and I don't know why but I ended up on videos of what narcissist where and how they seem and destroy. To make my situation 10x worse is I'm a recovering drug addict ,sexuslly abused as a child, empathetic co-derpendant! I didn't have a chance in hell to survive his cruel manipulative, and cunning plan to slowly but thoroughly destroy the strong, independent and confident woman I once was. But I started listening to the videos and I was so excited for this life saving knowledge I shared it with him, thinking it would show him how much I loved him, I knew this and he admitted to a lot of the diagnosis. I now knew I was not the crazy unlovable psycho ghetto chick HE had me believing I was,. Granted I have been a businesses woman in the same profession for 27yrs and make close to 100k annually, he has a part time limo driver who now lives in a nudist camp with a bunch of meth addicts in a tent but I thought I had found all the answers, and I Even found the answers to HELP HIM, I WAS GOING TO HEAL US BOTH.!!!!. LOL! ! Yes, you guessed it, he used my new found knowledge against me and was able to convince me that he was so broken because his mom, QUEEN OF ALL NARCASISST , had made him feel so less than all his life. So eventually I stopped watching and fell right back into the game. Although there was very few happy times anymore as he knew I was 100% addicted to him and used my love against me in the cruelest ways you could ever imagine. Always looking for a younger woman to join us.. telling me when I had a hard time with my sons or work that I was always whining poor me and I eas negative and insecure and on and on… it got so bad then it got physical and he then set me up for the grand finale, which I am in the middle of now. as you can see by the time this post posts up, I'm not sleeping or eating much. THE GOOD NEWS, IS I have found my way back to all of you, the people who know my nightmare and the aftermath that comes with being abused by a narcissist for 6 yrs. I just want you to know how thankful I am for you and all the other you tube life coaches, for taking time and really caring for us that had no idea what was happening to us and now giving me the little strength I have to get up every day and have some sense and hope that I will come out of this OK… although its a very tough rollercoaster ride right now. He got me good in the end and totally off guard, moved away obviously he found a new source to feed off but denies her even after I found pills for longer erections, massage table. and pics! but it's all in my head.. I'm jealous and upsetting hinn because I don't trust him… but thevwirse part is after all this said I'm here alone feeling so worthless and discarded knowing hes lying with someone else and I can barely function let alone breath… I'm in a coma like state moving thru the days barely aware of reality but engulfed in obsessive thoughts ..as he has gone completely silent no calls no texts nothing , like I don't exist , never existed .and just when I think I might be feeling like I have a brief moment of clarity… a text comes in reply to one of my very heart filled gut wrenching texts to him filled with why's and how and I thought u really loved me and I'm broken, crushed, devastated…. and his response to the sudden end of a six year twice engaged relationship with whom I thought was my best friend and soulmate… His reply……. "OK" ……that was 2ddys ago. SO THSNK YOU FOR BEING HERE FOR ME TO BE ABLE TO PUT ON MY HEAD PHONES AND LISTEN TO THE ONLY THING THAT MAKES ANY SENSE TO ME RIGHT NOW… THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO TRULY KNOW I'M GOING THRU SOMETHING VERY REAL, VERY LIFE CHANGING AND VERY DIFFICULT TO WRAP MY HEAD AROUND AT TIMES. How I got here, why me… blah blah blah. But no time to fall apart.. between work and a teenager, dogs one abandoned by him, I only have minimal time to "feel" anything for too long . I don't want to or don't mean to throw a puty party I just wanted to get it out and put it in safe hands. GN and thanks again Lisa

  60. I have to tell you that what you are saying here totally and perfectly describes my situation. I just moved out aft 7 years…..and my heart is broken. I still love him too….when we moved in together in these past two years…all hell broke loose. He became so verbally abusive, and me? I treated him like gold..on every level. I am in a different house now and so emotionally shattered from the hurt of his treatment, the loss, the whole thing….the pain is unbearable. I wish you lived near me, i would come to you for help…no one else has said the things you are saying…..

  61. I had so much true luck in my life having extremely loving father😢 he passed for New 2015 Year…

  62. No lie, there’s moments I have cried through this kind of relationship in the past hoping that things will be better and giving them second chances.. and I ended up having to go to therapy over it. I’m so glad I did lol… it feels like I finally got my life back.

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