Slow Jam the News with Senator Kamala Harris


-Last week was the third
Democratic debate, where 10 presidential hopefuls
went head-to-head. You know, I was actually going
to make a joke about this story, but I don’t think
it needs a joke. I think it needs
to be slow jammed. You know what
I’m talking about, Tariq? -Yeah, Jimmy.
I think you’re saying you want to slow jam this news.
-That’s right. I want to slow jam the news,
and I’m not the only one. [ Cheers and applause ] -Hi. [ Cheers and applause ] So, hello. I am Senator Kamala Harris, and I, too, would like
to slow jam this news. -Well, hit me six times! ♪♪ -During last week’s debate, I told the American people
why I’m running for president. I’m a public servant,
a civil-rights leader, and the second African-American
woman in history to be elected
to the United States Senate. [ Cheers and applause ] At the core of my campaign
is my 3:00 a.m. agenda, my plan to solve the issues
that keep Americans up at night. I’ll implement
healthcare for all and even give middle-class
families $500 a month right in their pockets. And let me tell you something,
I’m just getting started. -Oh, yeah. Kamala Harris
is just heatin’ up. She’s thinkin’ about you
late at night when you’re trying to put that sweet restless body
of yours to bed. Is that $500 in your pocket or are you just happy
your healthcare is free? With Kamala, it’s both. -♪ Ever since Barack left,
we’ve been off track ♪ ♪ But Kamala is trying
to get us back to black ♪ [ Cheers and applause ] -Now, here’s a question for you,
Kamala Cabello. [ Laughter ] This country’s got a whole lot of hot-button issues
that we can touch on. But what’s the first thing
we need to do to give us all some relief? -Well, let me start
by saying this. Climate change
is the single greatest threat facing our world today. [ Cheers and applause ] That’s why I’m committed
to passing a Green New Deal, creating clean jobs, and finally putting an end
to fracking once and for all. -Mmm! Mmm-mmm-mmm. Mamala Kamala
just don’t give a frack. She took a good look at Mother
Earth and decided it’s a MILF. A Mother I’d Like to Fix. [ Laughter ] -♪ The planet is a MILF now ♪ ♪ All right ♪ -All right. -♪ When it comes to climate,
she’s a real front-runner ♪ ♪ She’s heatin’ up like
it’s still hot girl summer ♪ [ Cheers and applause ] -I like the way you work it,
K. Higgity. But I gotta ask. Lately this country
has been so divided, sleeping on opposite sides
of the bed. Why do you think we can’t all
just come together? -Well, it’s my opinion
that we need a president who fights for the best
of who we are. And over the past three years, Donald Trump has done
the exact opposite. -Hold up. So what you’re trying to say
is that Trump’s the bad guy? ♪♪ -Duh. ♪♪ -Now, tell me this, Kama Kama
Kama Kama Kamala Harris. By now, we’ve seen the Democrats get down and dirty
on the debate stage. What about debating
President Trump? Do you think
you could deliver the goods against the
commander in cheese puff? -Well, Jimmy,
if I do debate President Trump, I’m sure it’ll be
a competitive faceoff where either one of us
could end up on top. -Really? -No. I’d wipe
the floor with him. [ Cheers and applause ] -All right, all right. One last tango in Harris
before this interview’s over. Now, we’ve got an audience jam-packed with college students
here tonight. So what would you tell
these curious coeds that you haven’t already? -Well, just that together, we can create the America
we believe in. We can uplift
vulnerable communities, and we can finally recognize
that crippling student-loan debt is a burden on all of us. That’s why we need
to make college debt-free for every American to attend. [ Cheers and applause ] -Wow. Now, that’s someone who knows
how to play to a college crowd. Well, guess what.
Two can play at that game. Oh, yeah.
White Claw fall. Ow! -Jimmy. Jimmy. Uh, do less. -♪ Kamala just dropped
a bomb-a-la ♪ -It’s time for a leader
who leads with their heart. -We must stand together,
or we’ll all fall apart. -♪ The nation is down,
but we can rebound ♪ ♪ The future is female,
and her time is now ♪ ♪ This girl is on fire,
don’t step on the fuse ♪ -And that is how
we slow jam the news. -Oh, yeah. -Give it up for
Senator Kamala Harris! [ Cheers and applause ]

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Comments

  1. God she is awful…amazing how the major media tries to prop her up and sell her to the public. She is the most fake politician I have ever seen. Gets 1% of the black vote nationally. Pathetic.

  2. Good thing that Tulsi Gabbard exposed Kamala as a fraud who put thousands of young people in jail for smoking pot…and then laughed about it when she admitted that she smoked pot. Kamala is awful. If Gabbard had 10% of the coverage Harris gets, she would be in the top two in polls

  3. This country's off track without Obama yet president trump has appointed more women to his cabinet than any president in history and is responsible for the lowest black unemployment rate in history and also is responsible for the death of Osama bin Laden's son. This lady is so unbelievably stupid, all these liberals are running for 2nd place.

  4. Ask her what it was like to fuck an elderly man to get ahead in her career? Or has she been sober at all during this clown show of a campaign?

  5. I liked it better when Jimmy was just a harmless unfunny POS…and Black Thought…wtf are you doing man? This is a one time pass.

  6. What they think is going to happen: "I'll make myself likable, and I'll seem like I'm cool."
    What actually happens: "How do you do, fellow kids?"

  7. It’s so annoying that people keep attacking Kamala for doing HER JOB AS A PROSECUTOR. She was following the law and was literally following the description of her position in our government. Being a president is completely different than being a prosecutor.

  8. The reason our country is so great is because of capitalism. In ANY form of government or society, there will be people at the top of the food chain and people at the bottom. No matter how many laws you pass, how much money is spent or how many lies you tell. But as half of our citizens get lazier and dumber, they need something to blame it on instead of themselves. You quit high school, didn't go to college or learn a trade, got married and bought a house and car you can't afford on the wages you make at the lumber yard, had four kids you can't provide for and now your life is in the toilet. You are a loser and you want the life the winners have so your solution is socialism. Bring EVERYBODY down to your level so you can feel good about yourself.

  9. 5 Β fun facts = Democrat policies overall suck / they will raise your taxes sky high Β / really screw up your health careΒ  / the plastic tops at star bucks use more plastic than Β the straws / Kamala Bologna is polling at 6%

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